Its 2025 - whats happening?

 Afternoon readers

          its only March and am already penning my first post!

So I realise I could mention the take over of a number of popular breweries by Keystone, or indeed the continuing demise  in numbers of unspoilt national Inventory pubs in the UK, but instead I wanted to write about ranting, by customers, at pub staff.

I am well aware that I "perhaps" drink too much and also that when I become drunk I simultaneously become a nodder, but in other people drunkenness bears a ferocious aggressive and solipsistic child, whose reason leaves them and they cling instead to imagined powers that they do not posess, like earlier this week. Allow me to Elucidate...

It was late on a midweek night in a popular Sheffield pub and probably about 30 minutes prior to closing. Two men I didn't know came in and sat down and started chatting but quickly one expressed his extreme irritation at them playing rap music, a phrase he couldnt accurately pronounce. After a couple of minutes he shouted "why dont you play some proper music instead of this rap shit" His friend told him to stop shouting which riled him further so he decided to storm over to the counter and shout the same accusation directly at the barman - who said, politely and calmly, that what they were playing was all music, and may even have suggested that some people liked the music they had chosen. Cue embolism number 2.

The stroppy man returned to his seat to complain that he didnt see why they didn't play proper music, instead they played this fuffin rab schyit.

I reneged the opportunity to ask him why he thought that rap wasn't music, and neither did I choose to explore which particular facet of the musical style he was unable to pronounce that enraged him so, nor did I enquire if he didn't like every single one of the millions of rap tracks ever recorded because of its established cultural backgrounds and influences. Instead I simply ignored them as best as I was able and then I awaited their threatened departure. Then came the line that really caught my attention. The loud guy returned to the bar as they were on their way out and once again started ranting about "rap shit" and then said " n I know xx and xx and I'll tell them about you and get this pub removed from the Good beer guide and (probably) youll never win pub of the month". 

Erm What now?

And this is when I realised that they were CAMRA members.

And I knew both of the gents he mentioned, one for nearly 30 years. And I was amazed that both those men had carried out surreptitious undertakings in Sheffield and Dronfield CAMRA as a Siloh of Silent Assassins to destroy and therefore close down any public houses or bars, which didn't meet strict musical requirements, weapons loaded, court orders at the ready and bile spilling between their clenched teeth pre action.

And do you now how the angry persons finished their visit?

As the bar man said that he didn't appreciate being shouted and sworn at and harrassed, they both said "fuck off" in unison before one said "gerra fuckin grip" as they stormed out. Children.

Lets just list all the normal and CAMRA benefits of the pub which they did not consider:

6 to 8 cask handpulls (admittedly these are just numbers - it could be 9) selling cask beers and ciders;

10 keg lines selling further and often stronger beers and ciders;

3 fridges selling further canned and bottled ales and ciders;

High quality fresh food produced in the newly refurbished kitchen;

Available function room upstairs for hire;

And what did the CAMRA members hate?

The style of music being played at closing time.

Interestingly - am not especially a massive fan of Rap music as a genre - because I have my own tastes in music. But in the event that a venue I liked or even one that I had first visited, played a style of music that I didnt like, I wouldn't undertake a roaring embolism of chuntering and swearing at bar staff, I would instead remember that I didn't live there, and go somewhere that I believed to be more appropriate. What an absolute shit show by these two Cameroids!

With kindest regards

Wee beefy

 men I

Shakespeares voted only the 5th best pub in Sheffield by CAMRA.

Hello,

             I thought today I might tackle the issue of the decision by the Sheffield CAMRA, who is a person, to vote Shakespeares the 5th best pub in Sheffield. The fifth?

Lets quickly remind you all that I am not a CAMRA member. Not since 1999 or 2000. I left for reasons including funds (mine), not actually giving a shit about Addlestones dispense methods, and mainly, because of a complete lack of interest from CAMRA in saving historical and locally important pub heritage, an area that Sheffield has been woeful at. I therefore don't any longer know what criteria the CAMRA apply to judging a pub.

However, I was in Shakespeares last night for a late drink. The two Chris's and the lass who's name I don't yet know were behind the bar, and whilst being served I found out that Shakespeares, recent pub of the year winner, was now only considered the 5th best Sheffield pub.

I disagree.

I was, once again drinking one of the beers of the year in Shakespeares, that being the OAP Double IPA brewed by North Riding and I think Five Towns. The one and a half pints of the immensely drinkable and perfectly hopped IPA at 9.6% was the perfect end to a night out. How many times have I said this before about a beer in Shakespeares? Obviously, the CAMRA judges have failed to enjoy this same experience quite as frequently as I have.

For info, the winner was the Kelham Island Tavern, for the umpteenth time, with the Blake, Fat Cat and Gardeners joining in behind. I drink irregularly in all the other four pubs. My intent here is absolutely not to slag them off. My concern is, what has improved in them and failed, in the eyes of CAMRA, at Shakespeares, in two years?

I don't blame CAMRA, a members organisation, for making this vote. Their members pay to make these decisions (or not, as am sure is still the problem). If nothing else this has stimulated debate, which is always a positive thing. The problem is, I don't see why any of the four pubs above are any better. I think until the CAMRA can reveal why Shakespeares boxes were not ticked. and which ones they are, we are left with a puzzling result that disheartens the hard working staff at Shakespeares and infuriates some of its devoted customers.

It is rumored that Sheffield CAMRA has 1400 members but only 60 voted. What I am certain the CAMRA would say is, if you disagree, join and vote differently. It makes sense, yes,  but its easy to say and I doubt those voting the Kelham winner in the recent past have now left. So would the results change if Shakespeares fixed and upgraded their loos and put in more comfy seats?

According to Facebook, people seem to think the following areas could be improved: Toilets, beer garden, and comfort. It would therefore be interesting to find out for definite the reasons behind the decision, from CAMRA judges. I really can't see how the pub could fall from first to second to fifth best in two years on the basis of price, and I doubt CAMRA would prefer one pub or four over another based on how comfy the seats are....

I have asked on Facebook and Twitter for comments and so far, all are in support of Shakespeares. Below are a few quotes.

"beer quality should be highly weighted (by which I mean both the pub keeping the beer well AND the beers themselves not being badly brewed)."

"Sounds like absolute cobblers. Henrys has wonderful toilets..... Shakey is tops for me for beer and service. I try not to spend too long in loo and it's rarely nice enough to sit outside."

"I think for a campaign for REAL ALE (as opposed to a campaign for nice pubs) clearly nowhere near enough weighting is put on beer quality or range..."

"Shakespeares is by far the best pub in Sheffield. Never change keep doing things exactly the way you have been. The bogs are the only area where there is room for improvement. Still number one as far as I'm concerned"

Obviously, as the author of this post, I have chosen the above carefully, but looking just at mine and Chris's Facebook pages I can't really see anyone agreeing with the result, despite concern about loos and seating. Does anyone agree?

Many people insisted that beer - quality, choice and price - should be the outweighing factor when assessing a pub. I agree, and this is where the decision falls down. I like all the top 5 pubs but Shakespeares sells the best beer. End of. This year, more so than any actually, the best beers I have tasted have been in there and I don't expect that to change.

For interest, my Top 5 Sheffield pubs are currently:

1. Shakespeares Ale and Cider House
2. Bath Hotel
3. Three Tuns
4. Brothers Arms
5. Blake.

Finally, I always think a good conspiracy theory livens up a debate so have cobbled together some of my own.

One: following the excellent display of beers brewers and related loveliness at Sheffield Beer Week by Shakespeares, this non CAMRA event has put their noses out of joint.
Two: the CAMRA felt so bad about kicking the Gardeners Rest out of the GBG and almost never recognising the Blake that those two's scores were inflated to counter that.
Three: fear of change. The Kelham has won for the 24th time...!
Four: I dunno, something to do with keg?

Cheers!

Wee Beefy