Afternoon readers
its only March and am already penning my first post!
So I realise I could mention the take over of a number of popular breweries by Keystone, or indeed the continuing demise in numbers of unspoilt national Inventory pubs in the UK, but instead I wanted to write about ranting, by customers, at pub staff.
I am well aware that I "perhaps" drink too much and also that when I become drunk I simultaneously become a nodder, but in other people drunkenness bears a ferocious aggressive and solipsistic child, whose reason leaves them and they cling instead to imagined powers that they do not posess, like earlier this week. Allow me to Elucidate...
It was late on a midweek night in a popular Sheffield pub and probably about 30 minutes prior to closing. Two men I didn't know came in and sat down and started chatting but quickly one expressed his extreme irritation at them playing rap music, a phrase he couldnt accurately pronounce. After a couple of minutes he shouted "why dont you play some proper music instead of this rap shit" His friend told him to stop shouting which riled him further so he decided to storm over to the counter and shout the same accusation directly at the barman - who said, politely and calmly, that what they were playing was all music, and may even have suggested that some people liked the music they had chosen. Cue embolism number 2.
The stroppy man returned to his seat to complain that he didnt see why they didn't play proper music, instead they played this fuffin rab schyit.
I reneged the opportunity to ask him why he thought that rap wasn't music, and neither did I choose to explore which particular facet of the musical style he was unable to pronounce that enraged him so, nor did I enquire if he didn't like every single one of the millions of rap tracks ever recorded because of its established cultural backgrounds and influences. Instead I simply ignored them as best as I was able and then I awaited their threatened departure. Then came the line that really caught my attention. The loud guy returned to the bar as they were on their way out and once again started ranting about "rap shit" and then said " n I know xx and xx and I'll tell them about you and get this pub removed from the Good beer guide and (probably) youll never win pub of the month".
Erm What now?
And this is when I realised that they were CAMRA members.
And I knew both of the gents he mentioned, one for nearly 30 years. And I was amazed that both those men had carried out surreptitious undertakings in Sheffield and Dronfield CAMRA as a Siloh of Silent Assassins to destroy and therefore close down any public houses or bars, which didn't meet strict musical requirements, weapons loaded, court orders at the ready and bile spilling between their clenched teeth pre action.
And do you now how the angry persons finished their visit?
As the bar man said that he didn't appreciate being shouted and sworn at and harrassed, they both said "fuck off" in unison before one said "gerra fuckin grip" as they stormed out. Children.
Lets just list all the normal and CAMRA benefits of the pub which they did not consider:
6 to 8 cask handpulls (admittedly these are just numbers - it could be 9) selling cask beers and ciders;
10 keg lines selling further and often stronger beers and ciders;
3 fridges selling further canned and bottled ales and ciders;
High quality fresh food produced in the newly refurbished kitchen;
Available function room upstairs for hire;
And what did the CAMRA members hate?
The style of music being played at closing time.
Interestingly - am not especially a massive fan of Rap music as a genre - because I have my own tastes in music. But in the event that a venue I liked or even one that I had first visited, played a style of music that I didnt like, I wouldn't undertake a roaring embolism of chuntering and swearing at bar staff, I would instead remember that I didn't live there, and go somewhere that I believed to be more appropriate. What an absolute shit show by these two Cameroids!
With kindest regards
Wee beefy
men I
